What matters most here is not what your parents thought of you but rather what they failed to see. Somehow a family friend crept in there and violated you from the child ages of 9 to 16. You said nothing as so many children do, perhaps in fear of the violator or to protect your parents. Your father is sick and can’t handle much trauma at the moment so is mine. I’m sorry for the loss of your husband. You have written a wonderful piece. Thank you.